Communication is one of the means through which we interact with each other. This ability to communicate follows closely with our ability to think, reason and feel our emotions as human beings.
Just as all other aspects of life, we communicate to the best of our ability. At least that is what we think we do! Yet, it is not uncommon that we are faced with difficulties in communicating our feelings, thoughts and/or views to others. More intense the need to communicate, or more important the message we wish to communicate, greater is the challenge we face in our ability to communicate that. Also more intimate and closely connected we are with the person greater the challenge in our communication. We face these challenges all the time – between parent and child, among siblings, husband and wife, teacher and student, player and coach, across co-workers engaged in critical project work, among close friends, etc.
Much of the reason for our difficulty in our communications can be traced back to our ignorance. Unaware of the true needs or ignoring that the time, place and circumstances are not correct we blurt out what we have in our mind. The undesired response and its cascading effects, we blame that as the unwillingness of the listener to hear what I have to say!
A large measure of our difficulty in communications can also be traced back to our bias or partial knowledge. This may be due to our emotional needs to communicate and set things right, whether or not it is possible. This may be due to our desire to avoid the pitfalls or do good for the other at any cost. Maybe it is also our ignorance and bias of trying to avoid taking true responsibility or sharing the blame with others? No matter what, these sorts of communication difficulties will persist leading to more and an unending series of challenges as our needs and wants are not fulfilled. https://sipractce.wordpress.com/2011/05/25/anatomy-of-our-experiences-objectivity-the-end-result/
There are also occasional situations when we are confronted with the reality that we wish to communicate what we know as the right input, for the right person at the right time and for the right reasons! Already this is a challenge as so many constraints have to be taken into account before we know the what, why, when and to whom of the message to be communicated! When these constraints are addressed apriori, most of the difficulties tend to subside. We are truly objective and not subjective. Because we know what is right to communicate it becomes our duty to do so. There is a certain dispassionate outlook. We communicate with non-attachment, not overly concerned about either the outcome or the effect. Our effort to communicate will continue with readiness to modify all that needs change in the what, why, when and to whom of the message to be communicated!
In the above three paragraphs we have addressed the three connectors (Guna) of Ignorance, Bias and Knowledge and the equilibrium states they create by one of these three connectors dominant over the other two (Gunathvam) of Inertia, Turbulence and Tranquility.
Prayer to the Lord is also a form of communication with the God. Recently I read the following passage in a communication from “See God with Open Eyes” Ch. 8 Ramakrishna’s Prayer p 204 from www.vedantastl.org
Prayer is a sincere, sensible, affectionate pouring out of the soul to God. A real prayer is not eloquent, nor is it a mere muttering of some words. It originates from the bottom of the heart with deep feeling. Genuine prayer is sincere, simple, direct, and frank; it manifests with passion through the body, senses, prana, and mind. Saint Ambrose said: “Prayer is the wing wherewith the soul flies to heaven, and meditation the eye wherewith we see God.” God definitely responds if the prayer is offered with one-pointed love and sincerity.
If we read the above passage carefully it also defines very clearly the pathway for sincere communication at times of great challenge or difficulty. We can replace a few words and use the above passage when faced with challenges in our communication:
Objective Communication is a sincere, sensible, affectionate connection with another soul. It is not eloquence, nor is it a mere muttering of some words. It originates from the bottom of the heart with deep feeling. Genuine communication is sincere, simple, direct, and frank; it manifests with passion through the body, senses, breathing, and mind. It is evidenced through clarity of thought and genuine prior reflection on what, why, when and to whom and a mind willing to change any of these as new knowledge is gained. Objective communication is dispassionate. It seeks no immediate results. It accepts the outcomes as they are with commitment for continued communication with non-attachment. The mere effort is the reward for objective and unattached communication!
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